Click on the photo to enlarge it.



















That is my son McKenzie, ain't he a cutie? He was born on March 1st at 7:57pm. The whole situation really burnt into my mind. I really wish I could describe the feeling I felt when I first saw him, but I don't think any words could do such justice. I just remember seeing him then his mother and feeling like I changed somehow, like for once things went right. I'll never forget the birth of my son, it was by far the most amazing thing I have ever and probably will ever see.
















I have posted more pictures here.



These are some poems I wrote about how I felt before and after his birth.




LIFE ON A MONITOR December 15, 2000

Nameless one, you lie within the warmth of life.
There I sit in amazement as for the first time in my whole life I felt I did something right.
For the first time in months I felt a warmth that was surrounded by a love.
Bonds held dear with unbreakable words whispered to myself.
Today I bid farewell to my youth, today has a new meaning, today I saw my son.

ME, HER, HIM January 9, 2001

Think, your actions were all practiced.
Reply, what did I say that night I can't remember.
Alone, felt it then now describe the pain to me.
You, one word you know to well.
Heart, you stole mine to replace yours.
Feelings, never mind.
Hate, still reminds me of your face.
Life, we created it unknowingly.
Can't, new favorite word.
Me, lost like always.
Her, wish I knew.
Him, a part of me I have yet to see.

WE ONCE WERE CHILDREN January 11, 2001

As children we would stray towards puddles,
Jumping into them even though it soaked our clothes.
Seems somewhere during this thing called "growing up" we lost that innocence,
Now we walk in straight lines like robots avoiding eye contact with the children we once were.

ALL A LIE January 17, 2001

I can't say that, describe it? Impossible.
How am I too know?
Can you say this?
Tell me it's what is was!
As a child, I looked up at a world with an open mind.
It closed quickly.
Tell that to him then, not aware of all the pain that lingered around the innocence.
I'm suppose to sit and tell my son this?
Tell him that all is well, when it's a big a lie.
Just a portrait of happiness that is stored away in some museum. It's all a lie.

PARENTAL GREETING February 10, 2001

Is it the fear of the situation you stuck your head into?
Better to have known before hand, what would result from desire?
Not afraid of the responsibility, afraid of the name I'll be called.
Dad is sad when he's mad, and sad he is.
"Hi, I'm your dad."

FIRST TOUCH March 1, 2001

Perfection is, this baby that you hold in your hands for the first time.
Looking into there sparkling eyes and feeling self worth again.
Perfection is just that, something you did right for once.
It's this little body that matches yours, those little fingers that hold yours.
The first and last of everything that means anything starts and ends with that first touch.
Perfection is a child.
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